Loons, Loons, and more Doubloons

Piles. Stop smiling, they aren't funny - at least not if they were yours. Once upon a time, not long ago, I could write a letter to a hospital somewhere in England - and the piles would be addressed. Slowly, perhaps - but simply.

Now, in our brave new world - I refer via Choose and Book -and the patient gets offered a choice of several consultants - but isn't allowed to know in advance which lower gut consultants treat piles!. Psychic powers, time wasted all round, and a third letter from me some months later sent the old-fashioned way.

Of coursethis lunatic system is so chaotic that many patients pay for a private appointment - so saving the NHS a fraction of the billions wasted on this computerised farce.